January 25, 2021

When Is Enough Enough?

Tom Vevers

MusicUnderdog, 2021

I find the idea of happiness fascinating.

Through my own struggles with mental health, through my own experiences with people in friendships, relationships, in therapy; people always express a desire to be happy but few find it easy to articulate what “happiness” actually means for them.

Recently, someone close to me was struggling with the breakdown of their marriage. We had a conversation about that feeling, that realisation that you’re not happy, that you’ve had enough. In my own experience, admitting you’re not happy is often the hardest step to moving on whether that its in a relationship, a job – whatever it might be.

There’s always a sense of obligation – to your partner, to your employer, to yourself, and it can be so easy to just back down and carry on hurting yourself but eventually you have to figure out where the line is and admit you’ve had enough. I wrote a song about this idea – about two people at each other’s throats and one decides they just have to get away. I think admitting you are unhappy is the first step towards making positive progress even if you feel guilty for feeling that way.