June 22, 2022

Are we all in on the lie that time heals?

Jordan Strachan

experimental, poetry, spoken word, recordingGrief - Are we all in on the lie that time heals?, 2022

According to my research, grief can destroy a person’s heart so much so that it actually causes death. The irony! What’s even more heartbreaking is the seemingly universal flaw us humans have when we use the phrase “time heals all”. When you lose someone- it’s a condolence- “it will get easier in time”. But it won’t. It doesn’t. It hasn’t for me. When we use these sentences, what we’re actually doing is suggesting that there is a measurable amount of time to process and grieve. That if some time has passed, a person should be healed. We’re merely lying to ourselves- and to one another. The problem with living in such deliberate distortion is that when we look in the mirror and see a broken person crying for someone who died years ago, we start to feel like we’re failing. Like we’re weak. We feel as if everybody else is doing a much better job and that there is something deeply wrong with us. When someone is taken from you, it can cause grave unhappiness- mental health can plummet. Thus, why on earth would we make it worse with false hope that time will fix everything?